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Asurion Ruins Everything

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On Tuesday September 27, 2016, my Samsung Galaxy S7 Edge was stolen out of my hands on the train heading home. Hoping to reclaim it from the thief, my plain failed when I was assaulted and my ankle broken when it was stomped on. Outside of that, I cannot be any more descriptive without my lawyer present.

However, Asurion has only proven that they would be more than happy to pour some salt into this wound, or rather would gladly step on the cast that my leg is in, by placing the replacement phone on "backorder". For how, long? They won't say. Regardless, more than a week is unacceptable.

This is not an isolated incident where Asurion says "we're sorry we just don't have enough of phone, how about a used version of some other phone". From the accumulated storied I have read online and from other phone providers (Brands A, S, and T as well) for other phones as well (Apple iPhone, Motorola Droid, etc.), Asurion as asserted their virtual monopoly on just about every phone and service and IT SUCKS! (I hope that does get bleeped.) They'll gladly take our money but they certainl don't seam at all too interested in expediting the claims process when they can just put eveything on backorder.

Today is Friday, October 7, 2016. My ELEVENTH DAY without a phone. And the "Asurion backorder" is still in effect, with now Hurricane Matthew being used as an excuse for why I (and man other people in my stituation) are still waiting on a phone replacement.  Last I checked there are no hurricanes on Nashville where Asurion is headquarted, no hurricane force winds keeping the planes grounded on the tarmac at Memphis International where FedEx and UPS have hubs, and it is a nice day in St. Louis where the sun is shining.  So explain exactly where in the supply chain their is a back order? Where is the bottleneck in your logistics system that makes it OK for Asurion to NOT resolve this claim before my next doctor appointment?

I don't want apology! The only acceptable apology is a gift box with a black box with my phone in it.  Last I checked, Samsung didn't have a factory in Busan where they had a Typhoon recently. So I don't want an apology. It's not going to matter if I switch providers because sure enough Asurion will be there to screw things up no matter who my service provider is. (If this isn't an episode of Adam Ruins Everything in the near future, no thing is.)

I want you, VERIZON not ASURION, to give me my replacement phone. The exact make and model. Black Samsung Galaxy S7 Edge.  The good lord knows Asurion is in no rush to do it even with the $200 deductible!

I won't leave Verizon, but I certainly hope Verizon leaves the Asurion Backorder Monopoly.

The only thing that I should be waiting on for 4 to 6 weeks should be my leg to heal. It should NEVER take this long to get my phone back!

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